2012 in pictures

I’ve been loving everyone’s 2012 recaps, and thought I’d do a quick one of my own. It was a big year, of course. The main event being the birth of my daughter, Penelope, in July. I also ran a lot, spent time with friends, had tons of fun with my husband, traveled a bit, and all kinds of other stuff. To keep this simple, I’ll probably make this photo recap all about the baby. And anyway, it is kind of all about the baby now.

January:

 

February:

March:

April:

May:

June:

July:

August:

September:

October:

November:

December:

Happy New Year everyone!!

December

So, over a month since my past post! Yikes. No posts in November- that might be a first. Needless to say, I’ve been busy. But also rather unmotivated to post. Of course, I have a million cute pictures (wait for it) but I post those often on facebook and that seems to satisfy my need to overshare baby photos.

I’m squeezing this in during the late stages of naptime so time is very limited. Some quick points-

Penelope is fantastic. She’s adorable, happy, and developing so fast. It’s a joy to be her mother. Her smiles are the best. She’s even working on an awesome little giggle. Motherhood is very challenging at times, and I am still struggling with many aspects of this new life. In particular, the lack of routine (she’s on as much of a “schedule” as you can expect of a 4 month old baby, but still). Every day is different. Every night for that matter! It is trying. But overall, we’re great.

I am officially a stay-at-home mom. I resigned from my job officially and am feeling good about the decision. I never had a doubt this is what I would do. It’s hard work, but way better than my unfulfilling office job. And with child care being so expensive, it was a no brainer for me. Money is tight, but we’re making it work. We do tons of fun stuff to fill our days- story time, hanging out with friends, meet Zach for lunch, play at home, plus all the errands and chores and daily baby responsibilities. Good stuff.

I’m struggling to fit running in. It sucks. I was feeling good about my volume and frequency (casual schedule, short runs) but then I started a "training program” (very loose term) for a half marathon in January and now I’m feeling way stressed out. I thought I wanted the structure but turns out I hate it. The weirdest part is that I don’t really care… I’m not as into running as before. I still love it, and need it, and plan on doing it as often as possible, but it’s just not as important to me right now. This surprises me. I thought I’d want to jump right into a big race but not so much. I’m just going with it for now.

We’re really looking forward to Penny’s first Christmas. Everything is so special with this little baby, it is just so fun. I’m extremely grateful for her, and for Zach, and for everything in my life.

Finally, I am letting myself off the hook for updating this blog. I am not interested in giving it up, but I can’t promise I will update on any regular basis. (clearly) I know it’s fine, but I want to get it in writing so I can officially feel relieved of the obligation. I do miss writing here, but I just can’t swing it. I’ll do what I can!

This part is easy. Pictures!

Fetching our Christmas tree last weekend:

 

For those of you who are still subscribed and read, Thank You!! :) Merry Christmas!

Monster Moon 5k Race Report

Another 5k! This was my 5th of the year. That’s about as many 5k races as I’ve done in all the previous 7 or so years of running! I’ve always been a long distance runner but lately the 5k has been fun. It was a great distance to “race” while pregnant (I did that three times) and a fun way to get back into the racing scene after giving birth. This was my second 5k since becoming a mom. I set the bar pretty high that first time by winning the race! This time I had no expectations of doing that again, but did hope to knock off a good chunk from my finish time. That race was only 7 weeks after Penelope was born and she’s now over 3 months old, so I am much stronger.

I signed up for this race at the last minute, as I have done for all of these 5k races this year. And once again I also kept quiet about any plans to run. My reason for this was I wanted the chance to change my mind at the last minute! No pressure.

The Monster Moon 5k was part of a series of races held at the Reserve Golf Course the Saturday before Halloween. All three races had a Halloween Theme and all looked fun. I chose the evening race because it fit best with our schedule for the weekend (Zach had a long run that morning and we had plans for mid-day). It was weird running an evening race and I can’t say I really liked it. I didn’t like thinking about it all day! Especially when that afternoon fog hit around 2pm. Getting geared up for a race didn’t seem that appealing!

But, I rallied my energy and we made it out to the golf course. I picked up my bib and was once again impressed by the organization of an Uberthons event. This is the second race I’ve run by them and it’s top notch. Professional set up, accurate course, instant results, etc. Love it! I sat in the car and breastfed my baby, and then sucked down a Gu and headed to the start. Life of a racing mommy!

There weren’t too many people gathered for the start, but at least a few of them looked legit. And they were all dressed in fitness attire (unlike that last 5k where most people seemed to be in jeans). I had no expectations of winning, although I had been joking about it with Zach before the race. I lined up front and seemed to be the only girl with my race face on. I thought, maybe I can win after all!

The run started at 6:00 pm and it was just getting dark. They required that we wear headlamps although they weren’t really needed, but it made for a fun sight. It was lightly drizzling- a break from the heavy rain we’ve had lately. The golf course was gorgeous- lots of colorful leaves and a few spooky looking trees, plus the ponds and great expanses of grass that you see on a golf course. It was warm too, about 60 degrees. Lovely.

They rang the bell and we were off! I planned on not looking at my watch once again and just running by feel. I never thought this would work for me but I did it last time and loved it. I started off and was the only girl in the front pack so I just made it my goal to keep it that way. There were about 5-6 guys ahead of me. The first couple took off super fast and the others I was able to keep in my sight for a while. Two men passed me and I think I passed two or three guys the whole time.

The only girl I saw was on a glance behind me in the first mile. She was a ways back and was struggling to take off her outer layer. I didn’t see her again after that. The way the route wound around the golf course you could always see runners ahead and behind, so I knew no girls were catching me.

The course was fun. It was winding with lots of turns that were all well marked. The scenery was nice and there were only a few baby hills. The wind was quite stiff in the last mile but that’s the only time I noticed it. Generally a very fun run! The only bad thing was there were NO mile markers! Or at least I didn’t see them (not sure how that would have happened). I did look at my watch to check the distance a couple times, but didn’t look at my time or pace.

I was working very hard the whole time and didn’t feel the need to check my pace. I knew I couldn’t go any faster. I figured I was slowing down a bit, and I was right. But I was holding my position and that was my main goal. My stomach was cramping up a bit. Not like a side-stitch but a general gut cramp. Ugh! I just held on best I could.

Finally, I saw the club house lit up in the distance and knew it was less than a half mile away. I wasn’t really able to pick up the speed at all but that’s ok. I paused my music so I could hear the announcer- something I missed the last race. He called me through as the first place female! Yay!! I smiled and waved at Zach and Penny as I ran through the finish line.

Official Results:

23:10 (7:27 pace)

1/44 Women

6/69 Overall

Mile 1: 7:04
Mile 2: 7:30
Mile 3: 7:49 (fade!!)
Last 0.12: 0:52 (7:15 pace)

I walked around a bit and tried not to throw up. I was beat. I kind of wish I’d ran that 10 seconds faster to break 23 minutes but I don’t think I could have. Something to shoot for next time!!

This was over a minute faster than my  previous race 7 weeks ago. It’s over a minute slower than my PR, set in 2007, but a fast time for me in general. I’m very happy with it.

We hung out a bit to wait for the awards. I got a big pink ribbon and they took a picture of the top 3 women. Love these small, friendly races. We headed home, put Penny to bed, and ate a big pizza dinner. Such a fun night!

I’ll keep running shorter distances for a while but do plan on ramping up soon. A half marathon is my next big GOAL race- I’ve officially registered for the Vancouver Lake Half Marathon in January! This 5k predicts a 1:47 half marathon- I know those predictions are not 100% reliable, but that seems reasonable to me and jives with my past times. Seems like a realistic goal to me.

A couple of Pictures:

  

PS Here is a race report on the same event on the Run Oregon blog. I’m the runner the author mentions passing and splashing! :)

Happy Halloween!

Pumpkin Spiced Everything

I’m fully in the autumn spirit. The season has really arrived and it’s a welcome change. The leaves, the rain, the cool temps. Love it.

I am lacking the motivation to blog lately, as you can tell. I am so busy during the day taking care of Penny- sometimes doing really fun stuff like going to story time, hanging out with friends, or going on hikes, and sometimes doing really mundane stuff like laundry. So much laundry. Plus, I just don’t feel inspired to write about anything in particular. Running is going really great, motherhood is a dream (with its fair share of challenges), and life in general is good.

I just wanted to check in to post some recent pictures, and say hi in case anyone was wondering about us. Hi! I’m still reading all your blogs and enjoying that very much. I’ll try to comment more!

There should be more interesting content coming up, perhaps a race report at some point? Nothing specific on the calendar but I might sign up for something on a whim. Still looking at a spring marathon, but that’s a ways off.

In the meantime, here’s what we’ve been up to. These pictures are all from the month of October. My little pumpkin. She will be 3 months old next week.

 

Whattta Summa

I love this time of year. Being a September baby I guess makes me partial to this late summer/early fall stuff. The weather continues to be gorgeous with just a little bite in the air in the mornings. It’s beautiful and easily my favorite time of year for running.

Speaking of running- it’s happening and it’s going good. Up to nearly 20 miles a week these last couple weeks and feeling like my old self. Running has been my escape. When I’m running, I daydream about all kinds of stuff, but mostly I think about running. I calculate paces, I fantasize about qualifying for Boston, I plan training schedules, etc. It’s a great break from thinking about naps, poop, breastfeeding. Mentally, I feel like my old self. Pace-wise, I’m getting there.

There’s more to say, but Penelope needs to eat and I need to change her and get her to bed. Naps, poop, breastfeeding. Etc.

Here are a few pictures of my summer baby welcoming the fall. We spent the day out in Hood River running (me), hiking (Zach and Penny), picking apples (all of us), tasting wine (Zach), and being adorable (Penelope).

 

 

 

    

Happy Fall!

Adjusting

Needless to say, my life has changed significantly since Penelope was born. It’s been a crazy 8 weeks! But, I feel like things are sort of starting to show signs of settling down. Still crazy, to be sure! But it’s starting to take some kind of shape. Her sleeping, her eating, and her awake times… my daily activities, my social life, my diet, my exercise… kind of getting into a groove.

This “settling down” thing (I am extremely hesitant to use the word routine or God forbid schedule), however slight, is excellent news for me. I am your typical Type-A, Perfectionist Virgo and the randomness was starting to wear on me. Not that we’re out of the woods by any means. It is still so hard.

In some ways, this semi-routine (eek, there it is!) is almost harder than the chaos for some reason. Before, I was just semi-successfully rolling with the Crazy New Everything. Then, one day last week, I suddenly decided Penny NEEDS TO BE ON A SCHEDULE! Wtf have I been doing?! I need to get my act together!!

Similarly, I felt like I was getting a lot of leeway (with myself, I realize no one else gives a shit) with a lot using the “I just had a baby” excuse. My running, my social availability, etc. Suddenly, I didn’t so much *just* have a baby and I feel like I should be back out there doing all the usual stuff I used to (and then some).

I know this is unrealistic, just let me vent here. I do understand that Penny IS still new, and I DID just have a baby. I know I’m doing a good job. When I sit down and go through it logically, I get that.

But, in frequent moments of doubt, it all seems so fucking overwhelming. I feel like a complete failure. I have no faith in myself as a mother. I’m convinced every other parent is sailing through all of this and I’m fucking everything up.

And I feel so alone, like I’m the only one going through this. Even though I have very close friends who are admittedly going through the exact same thing, and I am sure every mother in history has felt this way at some point, I still manage to somehow feel alone. Zach listens all the time to these rants and he is so reassuring and comforting. He is right by my side, but I still manage to feel alone.

 

Ok, this got away from me a bit. I actually meant for this to be a running post primarily! I guess I needed to get that off my chest. I imagine I sound so insane but seriously I am fine. There are so (soooooo) many joys in my life right now that I can’t stay down for long. There are rough moments, and then there is this:

She’s the greatest!

Also, I have this:

(running in general, not just races)

And I have him:

And so much more. My friends, my family, my beautiful city, this gorgeous weather, my health, etc etc etc etc. I am very blessed and I am very grateful.

I am doing my best to savor these precious weeks with my new baby, and to be present in general. To not get wrapped up in my doubts or worries. This is my goal.

But I am REALLY looking forward to having a routine! :)